8:19pm: The Wine of Youth /*****/ - Wow. This stuff is stunningly good. Why didn't we read this in high school? These stories treat the racism that was poked into our eyes in by such harlequins as Richard Wright in a more realistic & everyday manner. Racism is painful because of the personal insecurities it reveals, not because it is so outrageous and unbelievable that it has no bearing whatsoever on our lives today. 'Home Sweet Home' and 'Odyssey of a Wop' are two of the best. 'The Dreamer' obviously influenced Bukowski's style.

The Master and Margarita /***/ - I expected a lot coming into this, but was not overly impressed. This functions best as a subject of literary study, not as a read. The Devil's ball was entertaining. The Pontius Pilate storyline was trite.

-----------------------------
Nukie / / - This movie is unbelievably horrible. Not only is it bad, but it is excrutiating to watch. The scenes are repetetive, the reasons for characters actions are non-existent and half of the movie is made up of one alien squealing the other alien's name. It is as if this movie took ET's plot and made it tedious and painful to watch.

Think Big /***/ - Paul Brothers are truckers. Hilarity ensues.

10:30pm: The Naked and the Dead - Interesting, but the war story seems like the type of thing that would get old quick. Mixed the typical war story w/ a more depressingly human group of characters. Also, tells of the soldiers' private lives.
Use of casual sex as typical for American authors of the time; I'm sure it offended all sensibilities. But what do we have now? Pretty much the same thing, written with much less talent.

The Importance of Being Earnest - Silly little play in the vein of Jane Austen, but without the repetetive crap. Witty, but trivial. Like the guy wrote it to make a few dollars... or maybe he was a high-society homosexual.

The Petty Demon - The paranoia is hilarious. Setting, inept characters (visits & gov't esp) and main character seem reminiscent of Dead Souls. I prefer this one to Dead Souls as it is a lighter read. The ending is a bit Pushkinesque.

-------------------------------

Double Trouble - Paul Brothers make another attempt at acting; David Paul really tries hard... but they fail miserably. However, if you go in expecting a goofy pair of meatheads hamming it up, you won't be disappointed. The plot is 1980s, the special effects are 1920s, the acting is 100,000 B.C. The villian is pretty good, and Whitney and the impeccable sense of fashion possessed by the Paul brothers are hilarious. The best part is that you can watch it once a month and never really remember what is going to happen.

12:00am: 1)Was 2005 a good year for you?
It wasn't bad

2) What was your favorite moment of the year?
Probably bowling with all the friends

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
Being super hungover after acting like a jerk to a bunch of people.

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
BRLA

5) Who were you with?
You mean the actual day? Probably my parents.

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends?
Home I guess.

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
Family

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005?
No

9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006?
No

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?
No, thank god. Love is a joke with no punchline.

11) If yes, with who?


12) If yes, do they know?


13) Are you still in love with them?


14) You regret it?


15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005?
yeah

16) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
of course!

17) Who are your favorite new friends?
Carrie, Kyle

18) What was your favorite month of 2005?
I guess July

19) Did you travel outside of the US in 2005?
Spain

20) How many different states did you travel to in 2005?
none... how depressing

21) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
yeah, but then I found them wandering around the parking lot

22) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
sure

23) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
The Return

24) What was your favorite song from 2005?
Pretty much everything released in 2005 was unredeemable garbage

25) What was your favorite record from 2005?
See above.

26) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
3

27) Did u have a favorite concert in 2005?
Bela Fleck in Madrid

28) Did you drink a lot of alchohol in 2005?
Depends on the definition of a lot.

29) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
No

30) How many people did you sleep with in 2005?
1

31) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?
certainly, but it doesn't take much for me to be ashamed

33) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
hahaha, who knows? All of my lies are good to me.

34) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?
yes

35) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?
maybe, I am quick to forget

36) How much money did you spend in 2005?
Well, seeing as how I do most of the spending at work.... well over $100k I would guess

37) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
Masturbating on a cheering crowd (aka I don't fucking know)

38) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005?
see above

39) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would you change?
If I Could change ANYTHING? Don't get me started...

40) What are your plans for 2006?
Tell school to fuck off and move into my spacious refrigerator box.

12:41am: I had this weird dream where this girl I know came on to me. This isn't all that weird, as I think that if I gave any sign of interest she would probably be quite happy; but in my dream she came onto me in a way that made her seem slutty, and I was torn between enjoying the attention she paid me and doubting the purity of her desires. THAT was weird. Would I be torn if the scenario were to actually happen? I suppose it's good that I don't have many loose women (or women of any sort) after me.

12:03am: I hate when people lie. Then they act like they are the most honest person around... but it's so obvious that they are a stinking liar. And it's always something that is totally irrelevant and entirely innocuous that is lied about. Why chew up a relationship over something like that? And especially when they aren't going to make an effort to hide it? They have to know it is going to be found out. Are they really that apathetic and lazy? Are they just bored with their pointless lives? Wouldn't suicide be a little more spicy?

12:15am: The most dreary thing about life at my age is that there is nothing to look forward to. Marriage and kids is a sham, and a ticket to an early grave. Kids is obvious; how could I possibly imagine that I could find someone that I would want to marry? Marriage for me will be a coward's suicide. I have nothing more to live for; will you take my life and bury it under your demands?

A career is even worse because it is a necessity. What would it be worth to be locked in jail for 8 hours a day 5 days a week?... and sleep on your own time! At least jail would not require any thinking-on-demand or debasement of oneself (the 2 categories of work).

It's no wonder, then, that I have been a touch depressed as of late. I have no future.




disclaimer: all views subject to change... so if I ask you to take my burnt out husk of a man in marriage, pretend you didn't read this :P

12:01am: I dunno what the hell is wrong with me. I cannot, for the life of me, write anything even remotely readable. I think it is more a communication problem in general, than an actual inability to write. Everything ends up choppy and boring like this. And I usually don't even give a damn that it is unreadable trash. I suppose that, if I ever actually had something to say, this problem could potentially make life difficult.

Another problem is that I am a cynical, self-centered asshole. I don't know if that one is fixable. Maybe I can hide it... *diabolical laughter*

1:55am: If you insist... +1
Three Names You Go By
1. Tommy
2. Thomas
3. Tom

Three Parts of Your Heritage
1. French
2. German
3. English

Three Things That Scare You
1. Socialism
2. Boredom
3. Driving in or around Baton Rouge

Three of Your Everyday Essentials
1. Water
2. Banjo
3. Candy

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now
1. Boxers
2. Earring
3. A smile

Three of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists--at the moment
1. John Lee Hooker
2. Béla Fleck
3. Hope Sandoval

Three of Your Favorite Songs - at the moment
1. O Morro Nao Tem Vez
2. Shucking the Corn
3. House of the Gods

Three Things You Want in a Relationship (other than Real Love)
1. Trust
2. Passion
3. Comfort

Two Truths and a Lie (in no particular order)
1. My desires really piss me off sometimes
2. I wish I were dictator of the world
3. If I were dictator of the world I wouldn't abuse my power

Three Physical Things about -Females- that Appeal to You
1. Mannerisms
2. Smile
3. Smartitude (I muse not be hard to please)

Three of Your Favorite Hobbies
1. Hurting people's ears
2. Frisbee
3. Bowling

Three Things You want really badly right now
1. Some idea of what I will do in the near future
2. Her name starts with 'beautiful'
3. A temporary escape with an option on permanence

Three Places You Want to go on Vacation
1. Argentina
2. Sudamerica (other than Argentina)
3. Eastern Europe

Three Things You Want to Do Before You Die
1. Get a real job
2. Quit a real job
3. Marry a bear :P (no way anyone who knows what I am talking about reads this)

Three people I would like to see take this quiz
1. Spaceman Spiff
2. The pink Power Ranger
3. Baby Jesus

Three strikes, you're out
1. Fundamentalist zealot
2. Otherwise stupid
3. Obnoxious drunk

12:10am: sickening
Life seems like an wizened toothless lion, slowly gumming me to death. I realize it is improper for the situation, but I am bored, and wish it were faster. Suddenly I get what I have long wanted: a tooth. But it is fleeting (how?!? Aw fuck, this metaphor is falling apart/ was shit to begin with) and now I am bored and bleeding.)

I know I get the wrong impression from the way she moves, smiles. Does she?

12:14am: For some reason I feel like I am hitting myself on the head with a brick...
With the change of scenes comes a reemergence of a not-quite forgotten actor. That should be on a fortune cookie.

I had a thought on hope and aging today (facebook) and it seems that they are inversely proportional. I felt a pop, if you will, in my life today... the culmination of many things tedious and ordinary, pleasantly interrupted by regression, slowly fading as it is worn into dust.

Isn't it odd how a woman's eyes look the same in malice as in love? They both feel nice. Maybe there's a relationship between them.

1:29am: There is nothing more capable of turning my stomach that people from Livingston Parish. Yes, here we go again. I'm sorry to the noone who reads my livejournal, but I just cannot help myself. If ever there were an argument for genocide it is Livingston Parish, Louisiana.

Now, don't get me wrong; there are plenty of people from Livingston Parish who are normal. However, the very vast majority can only be described as retarded yokels. Where else can one find such a perfect combination of uneducated, racist hick and know-it-all, SUV-loving yuppie? Where else can one hear the words "I feel sorry for all those *whisper* black people *whisper* from New Orleans," followed seconds later by "Them queers are going to hell!"? How did these people figure out how to breed? Why am I not allowed to walk through town, blasting everyone I meet with a shotgun, as in some zombie flick?

9:13am: Well, it's been a while. This hurricane thing is retarded. It's so overblown in the LA media. I know that noone who was not personally affected gives a damn. Half of the people that saw that Louisiana had been hit by a hurricane probably said, "Oh, those poor Africans!."

I think it is a good thing. First of all, that city could use a cleaning. And this one is FREE! Secondly, it probably killed a bunch of poor people. I'm going to go ahead and ruin my political career by admitting that I don't particularly care for poor people. The whole rampant looting thing reaffirms my distaste. Go get a job you lazy assholes!

Well, I think that's enough alienating of the 2 or 3 people who have ever read this for one day.

10:02pm: So seriously, I'm convinced that some higher power is out to get me. The last two weeks have been extraordinarily terrible. I have had 3.5 papers worth a total of 25 pages due. I had a group project that collapsed like a shanty in a hurricane. I got a 44 on a math test -- mainly due to having to stay up all night and write one of the papers instead of sleeping and studying. I had another group project which I basically had to do all on my lonesome AND still waste time meeting with people for.

On top of all that Julie decided that she wanted to screw me over. Unfortunately I really care for her, and so I'm going to have to move out of the apartment sometime this week. I wish I could bring myself to pick up some unsavory skank to do in the apartment before I go. Instead I'll just have to take solace in the fact that in a few years I will look back and think "What a great life I have without Julie." Who am I kidding? I'll be a fat, bearded fucker sending out mail bombs from a cabin in Montana. At least she'll have to be on her toes whenever she checks her mailbox.

2:01pm: Since a number of people have noticed that I've been a bit sullen for the past week, I will admit that yes I have. Life has been a dirty, dirty whore lately and it really needs a good spanking.

Of course, 2 people actually read this and neither of them are the ones that said anything... but what the hell.

9:30pm: Don't you hate when you forget that everyone is out for themselves only?

TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name:	Tom
Birthday:	22/5
Birthplace:	B.R. LA
Current Location:	B.R. LA
Eye Color:	green/brown
Hair Color:	brown
Height:	5'6
Right Handed or Left Handed:	right
Your Heritage:	I dunno, european?
The Shoes You Wore Today:	sandals
Your Weakness:	like there's only one...
Your Fears:	hookers with chainsaws on meth, not having anything to do
Your Perfect Pizza:	sauce, cheese, mushrooms and crab
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year:	dance on someone's grave
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger:	LOASLDOUTJGHVH66T
Thoughts First Waking Up:	shit, I'm late
Your Best Physical Feature:	eyes
Your Bedtime:	12:00-2:00
Your Most Missed Memory:	I try to live in the present
Pepsi or Coke:	water
MacDonalds or Burger King:	neither if I can help it
Single or Group Dates:	I never date, but I guess single if I want in her pants, group if it's blind;
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea:	neither
Chocolate or Vanilla:	vanilla ice cream, chocolate cake
Cappuccino or Coffee:	none
Do you Smoke:	only illegal drugs
Do you Swear:	constantly
Do you Sing:	only when I'm drunk or alone
Do you Shower Daily:	there've been times...
Have you Been in Love:	yes
Do you want to go to College:	not anymore
Do you want to get Married:	I dunno, no time soon
Do you belive in yourself:	no, I'm convinced I don't exist
Do you get Motion Sickness:	no
Do you think you are Attractive:	I frequently make out with the mirror
Are you a Health Freak:	hahaha
Do you get along with your Parents:	when I don't live with them
Do you like Thunderstorms:	sure
Do you play an Instrument:	banjo
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol:	hahaha
In the past month have you Smoked:	strange... I can't remember
In the past month have you been on Drugs:	see above
In the past month have you gone on a Date:	no
In the past month have you gone to a Mall:	no
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos:	part of one
In the past month have you eaten Sushi:	yesterday
In the past month have you been on Stage:	no
In the past month have you been Dumped:	no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping:	no
In the past month have you Stolen Anything:	no
Ever been Drunk:	hahaha
Ever been called a Tease:	probably, but I'm sure the one calling me that was the real tease
Ever been Beaten up:	not that I recall
Ever Shoplifted:	no
How do you want to Die:	It's not how I want to die, it's what I want you to do with my body afterward :P
What do you want to be when you Grow Up:	naked
What country would you most like to Visit:	I don't care as long as it is free
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color:	brown
Favourite Hair Color:	brown
Short or Long Hair:	short
Height:	exactly 5'2 and 1/2 -- what a stupid question, I don't give a damn
Weight:	at least 400 lbs but less than 1500.
Best Clothing Style:	naked
Number of Drugs I have taken:	?
Number of CDs I own:	?
Number of Piercings:	0
Number of Tattoos:	0
Number of things in my Past I Regret:	all of them
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!

12:33pm: Since my last rant wasn't enough to start a riot...
I can't stand the "black people". I like black people, but when I think of "black people" as a group I get a grotesque look on my face. Of course, that is because the group name has been usurped by a few disgusting organizations known as "civil-rights" groups.

None of these civil-rights groups want to end discrimination. How could anyone possibly believe that supporting such wild ideas as financial reparations for slavery or affirmative action can possibly make you fit in any better? That's like me saying "I should get a dollar from every person in the world every day," and then justifying it by the fact that everyone hates me for taking their money. These groups are basically lobbyists that push for more, more, more based solely on skin-color. That is the definition of racist.

Someone should give the NAACP and other groups that supposedly work to end discrimination a none-to-gentle kick to the pelvic region.

11:06am: Let's dispel a myth...
Happiness is not something that can be measured on the scale of a lifetime. People who think that denying themselves pleasures now is going to lead to a happier life are morons. They may be happier people, but that is coincidental and due more to a lack of connection with reality than superior philosophies.
(Note that dogs also seem to be happier than most people.)
Rather, happiness on the large scale is more a matter of wallowing in the highs and tempering the lows. So, when you are shooting heroin or fucking some girl that you aren't going to call again, enjoy it. And when you are in rehab or getting treatments for your chlamydia, don't sweat it man.
There'll always be another high.

12:39pm:

This is all wrong. Except for creationists.

1:04pm: If only I were English...
------------------------------------------

Who should I vote for?

Labour -36
	Conservative 17
Liberal Democrat -10
	UK Independence Party 9
	Green 1

You should vote: Conservative

The Conservative Party is strongly against joining the Euro and against greater use of taxation to fund public services. The party broadly supported the Iraq war and backs greater policing and ID cards. The Tories are against increasing the minimum wage above the rate of inflation, and have committed to abolishing university tuition fees. They support 'virtual vouchers' for private education.

Take the test at Who Should You Vote For
-------------------------------------------------

11:10am: Necesito a practicar mi Español...

Pues conocí una mujer interesante en jueves. Ella está en mi clase de CSC. Había dado cuenta en esta mujer, pero, porque siempre estoy cansado en esta clase, no había hablado con ella... y también ella es de india (más ó menos) y no sé nada de la cultura (salvo el racismo de Roberta y Amra :P).
Así pues fuí a la clase en jueves con 5 ó 6 horas de sueño y la era muy aburrida. Pero cuando la termina, ella me pregunta si quise trabajar con ella en un proyecto de grupos. ¡Desde luego!
Es más interesante que ella no lo pregunta a su amiga que también está en la clase y estaba de pie allí mismo. Deséame suerte! :)

11:09pm: Y ahora cuando avanza al fin del ensayo, como Bárbara mis papeles estan mezclando… si por “papeles” yo quiero decir “cerebro y cráneo”. Es una suciedad total. Mis orejas están rezumando rojo. Me esta dando vueltas en la cabezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

10:14pm: So Tamar calls and asks me and Julie to go to N.O. with her and a couple of her friends on Friday. Great, sounds like fun. Well, of course Julie has to work at 9:00 on Saturday. So I call around, see if anyone else is driving and not staying the night. Wonderful. Teresa is looking for some company on the ride there and has to be at work for 10:00 on Saturday.
We drive down, everything is nice.
We meet everyone in the quarter. We're the last to arrive; everyone is already boozing it up. It's N.O. so I'm not really inclined to drink that much. Well, we're hanging out here, hanging out there Tamar's buddy gets sick. Her other buddy asks me to help him walk her to the hotel. No problem. I walk the girl and the other buddy walks with Julie (funny how he didn't need help, just some time with Julie :P). Teresa, Dusty, John, Joey and Tamar are all still in the shite club. So we walk to the hotel. Right before we get there we run into Joey and Tamar (poor Joey's penis will have to wait thanks to Tamar's liquored up buddy.) We hang out there for a bit and then I call Teresa to see what they are doing. Well, when I call she's a-crying.
"What ever is the matter?"
"You left me here all by myself!"
Well, that's a fat load of shit, but Teresa can be the dramatic one so no worries.
"Well come to the hotel!"
"I dunno where it is!"
"Ok, where are you I will meet you there?"
Great, so I start to walk back across the quarter (Julie in tow.) When we get there there's no sign of her. So I call her.
"Where are you?"
"I'm at the hotel"
"WHAT THE FUCK? Well I will meet you there, wait for us outside"
So I walk all the way back. When I get there she isn't there. I wait a few minutes. Some guys standing there tell me she's gone to the pisser. I wait 15 more minutes.
"Teresa where the hell are you?"
"I'm going to the bathroom, I could't find the room"
Fine. I wait 15 more minutes.
"Teresa where are you?"
"Quit bothering me"
And she fucking hangs up on me. Well, I'm not fucking happy. I go in, hop on the elevator and head to the 17th floor. When I get there she is sitting in the hall with Dusty and Michael.
"WTF is wrong with you Teresa? Why the fuck did you make me walk across the quarter and then wait outside for half an hour?"
Dusty, in my face for some unknown reason,
"Leave her the fuck alone man"
"Fuck you! What the fuck business is it of yours?"
Background: Dusty can sometimes be a total asshole when he drinks. He proceeds to remain in my face.
me: "I will fucking kick your ass if you don't back off"
"Why don't you do that"
Tempting, but instead I push his ass out of the way, against the elevator door. I think he is well aware that the bear will eat him if he keeps taunting. The three of them hop on the elevator. I take the next one down and stand outside. We (me & Julie) wait, Michael comes out and says Teresa is not willing to drive back to BR. That worthless fucking cunt. Julie goes in to talk to her. Teresa is somehow blaming this on me. She claims she was mugged while she was waiting for me. Funny how she never mentioned that to me on the phone. Funny how this happened on the busiest street in New Orleans outside of a club that was packed with people. Funny how she never got the police involved. Funny how every other word out of her mouth the entire night was a filthy lie.
So now Julie is fucked because she has work in B.R. in 4 hours. I am fucked because I have nowhere to stay the night. So I actually have to call my parents at 4:30 in the fucking morning to come bail me out. WHAT THE FUCKING HELL? We get back to the apt at 7:45. Lucky Julie gets 1 hour of sleep. My parents had to fucking drive an hour two ways at an ungodly hour b/c Teresa is a worthless human being.
She'd better hope she doesn't run in to me b/c I might put my foot up her ass.

10:06pm: So how is it that men's restrooms always have urine on the floor? I have been in many a men's restroom in my day and never heard anyone say "Look! No hands!" and/or suddenly begin windmilling wildy. And yet there it is no matter what time of day or how much traffic it gets. Perhaps there is a secret society that, angered by the world, decided to take their revenge by urinating on the floors of bathrooms. This serves two purposes, making a mess to spit in the face of the "man". And annoying people just enough to send them over the edge and into the exclusive club. So, next time I feel the urge, I am going to head to the restroom and just begin urinating on everything (and everyone) I see. I am convinced that a secret door will open up and I will be invited to join the cult.

So if I don't return your calls, you know where I am.

8:41pm: Oh god I'm so bored!
Just like Allie as it turns out...

Your Ultimate Purity Score Is...
Category	Your Score	Average
Self-Lovin'	55% Explored the pleasures of the flesh	65.1%
Shamelessness	78.6% Has yet to see self in mirror	79.2%
Sex Drive	63.2% A fool for love, but not always	77.6%
Straightness	16.1% Knows the other body type like a map	44.5%
Gayness	94.6% Repressed, are we?	83.8%
Fucking Sick	89.4% Refreshingly normal	90%
You are 67.52% pure Average Score: 72.6%
Take The Ultimate Purity Test and see how you match up!

You Belong in 1963

1963 If you scored... 1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in! 1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too. 1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all! 1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day. 1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good!

You scored as Gluttony. </td> Wrath 63% Gluttony 63% Pride 50% Envy 50% Lust 44% Sloth 25% Greed 19% Seven deadly sins created with QuizFarm.com

Your EQ is

113 50 or less: Thanks for answering honestly. Now get yourself a shrink, quick! 51-70: When it comes to understanding human emotions, you'd have better luck understanding Chinese. 71-90: You've got more emotional intelligence than the average frat boy. Barely. 91-110: You're average. It's easy to predict how you'll react to things. But anyone could have guessed that. 111-130: You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt. 131-150: You are remarkable when it comes to relating with others. Only the biggest losers get under your skin. 150+: Two possibilities - you've either out "Dr. Phil-ed" Dr. Phil... or you're a dirty liar.

10:19pm: My teacher called me "estupido" and I said "what the hell does that mean?" And she said "it means you are stupid" and I said "ok".